by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 10, 2012 | bullying, children's literature, classroom lessons, curriculum
In my previous post, I outlined how I used a comprehensive counseling approach to address a first grade bullying situation through classroom teaching, small groups, and individual counseling. (Read about it here.) In this and upcoming posts, I’ll share the lessons from the new first grade bullying unit I developed. (Related ASCA standards are listed at the end of this post.) The objective for the bullying unit was: When students experience or witness bullying they will be able to: differentiate between mean and bullying behaviors. recognize that bullying should be reported to school staff. use a script to report bullying to school staff. tell another school staff member if the first adult does not believe or understand the report. I had thought carefully about how to define bullying in a way that would be meaningful and comprehensible to first graders, and that would provide a foundation for, and mesh with, the definitions and language we use to talk about bullying in later grades. (See Spiraling Bullying Prevention.) Here is the definition I came up with: A situation is bullying when: mean behavior happens over and over, or a group is being mean to an individual, or it involves a threat Here is the outline for the first lesson: 1. Ask students, “What is bullying?” This will give you a sense of how close their current concept of bullying is to the definition you are going to work with. This also gives you information to use when assessing their learning at the conclusion of the unit. When I taught this lesson this year, 25 of 38 students gave responses, most of... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 10, 2012 | bullying, curriculum, group counseling, individual counseling, planning
This is not a tale of the high seas. It’s about one stormy year in kindergarten, when a combination of individual students’ behaviors developed into a “perfect storm” of bullying. A couple of kids didn’t know how make and keep friends without using intimidation. Some others’ impulsivity hindered their ability to think before they acted. Some did not know how to be assertive, and reacted in a way (tears, giving in to intimidation) that reinforced the bullying. A few did not know how to make good friendship choices, and consistently put themselves back into situations in which someone else might be mean to them. Some had annoying behaviors that unwittingly provoked a bullying response. The kindergarten teachers, special educators, and I were in constant reactive mode, life jackets on, bailing like crazy. We intervened every time we saw or heard about bullying. We added lessons and read-alouds to expand upon Second Step. I spent additional time in the classroom and worked with several students individually (none of the involved kids were ready for a group.) We followed our school’s discipline protocol, had parent meetings, set up behavior plans, and brought individual cases to the Education Support Team. But it still wasn’t enough. Some days it felt like the ship was going down. I know you know the feeling. Yo, ho, ho and a bottle of Tums! When a situation gets overwhelming like this, it’s time to step back, take a good look at what is happening and why, and make a plan. So . . . This is also a tale of smoother sailing in first grade. We remixed... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 7, 2012 | assessment, children's literature, classroom lessons, group counseling
Looking for a way to expand upon what you’re able to teach in your limited time in the classroom? Wondering about how to assess your students’ learning at the end of a unit? Book studies can help you do both. Book studies can be used for a variety of topics: conflict resolution, bullying, responsibility, differences/diversity, friendship, emotional literacy, etc. All you need is a selection of books; a report form; and (depending on your school’s technology) an overhead projector, SmartBoard, or if all else fails, large copy of the report form on chart paper.) A book study can take anywhere from one to three classroom sessions — your choice.They are also great for groups. 1. Gather books on your chosen topic. Choose a variety of reading levels so that you can be sure that all students in the class have access to books that they can easily read, comprehend, and report on. Sometimes books for younger readers have messages and information that can be just as powerful as (or even more than) a grade level book. Try to gather enough books so that everyone, individually or partnered, can find a book that interests them. I generally clean out my shelves and visit the school and public library if I need more. A great resource for finding books by topic is Books That Heal Kids. 2. Create a grade-appropriate report form that will help the students think about what they have read and link it to what they have been learning in your unit. Include a place for the student’s name, the book title, and several questions (3-4 for 2nd... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 5, 2012 | empathy, individual counseling, oppositional
You know that kid who doesn’t like to join in as a member of the classroom community? The one who says everyone else is annoying? Who needles other kids to get a reaction because he isn’t quite ready to take the risk of making a friendly overture? For whom power struggles are a seeming delight? Luckily he (or she) doesn’t come along very often, but when he does he can be one tough customer! Kids like this need help with building friendship skills, developing empathy, and managing anxiety. Often, though, their defenses are so well established that they don’t easily buy into the idea of working to change their behavior. What they are currently doing works for them, even though (especially because?) peers and adults are constantly making it clear that they don’t like it. In these cases, I sometimes use a sneak attack, harnessing the kid’s very defenses to help him fortify his friendship and empathy skills, while undermining the anxiety that keeps him from taking friendship risks. One third grade friend and I used this strategy, which he called “The Secret Sparkler.” (Ha! Mr. Resistant took ownership of his own nemesis!) The idea appealed to his comfort with his outsider status, his love of control, and the pleasure he got from “putting one over” on someone. In our first session, after it became clear that the usual methods were not going to work, I asked him if he would help me with a project, but that it had to be top secret from the other kids. Already, he was hooked! I told him that I needed someone... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 4, 2012 | bullying, classroom lessons, curriculum
Last week the counselors in my district were asked to present information on how bullying is addressed in each of our schools, and I thought it might be helpful to highlight some of what my counseling partner, Erica, and I shared. We start from the premise that bullying, bystander, and target behaviors are often a result of lagging skills in the areas of empathy, problem solving, conflict resolution, social thinking, self-monitoring, and/or self-advocacy. To build kids’ skills, we teach a developmental, spiraling bullying prevention curriculum K-5. For each grade, bullying is defined in a way that is meaningful and can be understood by students at that level. We have found that the more familiar the kids are with the bullying definition, the more likely they are to stand up to bullying (for themselves and others), report the bullying to an adult, and change their own bullying behaviors. Some of our lessons have been adapted from a variety of materials. We have created many of them ourselves. In these classes, the kids learn language and expectations that we refer to when working with small groups and individuals around issues of conflict and bullying. The administrators and many of the teachers also use the language and expectations when addressing behavior and handling discipline issues. Kindergarten Second Step (taught by counselor and teacher) provides foundational skill-building with units in empathy, emotion management, problem solving. Bullying definition: All social behaviors are labeled as “friendly” or “unfriendly.” The term “bullying” may be used to describe behavior in individual situations, but is not taught directly. 1st Grade (1). Conflict Resolution unit focusing on empathy, listening,... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Mar 3, 2012 | individual counseling
A great way to help students identify the range of feelings that they are experiencing is to use post-it notes. (You could also use index cards or small pieces of paper, but there’s just something about the stickiness . . . ) I use this technique all the time, including yesterday, when working with a third grader who is clearly depressed and anxious, but reluctant to talk about how she is feeling. I start by having the student choose a marker and the color and shape of post-it note she wants us to use. Then we get the “uncomfortable feelings” poster from my bulletin board. If at all possible, I have the student do this herself. The movement of walking across the room and and sensory experience of pulling the tacks out of the poster and pushing them back into an empty spot on the bulletin board seems to help gear kids up and provide a little energy boost. The student and I slowly read the list of uncomfortable feelings aloud and I ask her to identify those that she is experiencing. As she does so, I write the feeling word on a post-it note and stick it to the table in front of us. Students are generally able to identify at least five feelings. If the student seems to be unclear about the meaning of any of the words, I explain: for example, “Discouraged. That’s when you feel like you’ve tried and tried, but something still isn’t going well.” After we’ve gone through the whole list of feelings, we look at the collection of post-it notes and I... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Feb 22, 2012 | collegiality, counseling jobs
Hiring season for the next school year will soon be upon us! If you’re looking for your first counseling job or making a move from your current position, I’m sure you’ve already done your research about the job search, resume and cover letter writing, references, and interviewing in general. Follow all this advice! If you haven’t already, be sure to check out ASCA’s job search and interview tips and School Counselor Blog’s interview tips. Let me also give you an interviewer’s inside view. Because the school counselor holds a central, often unique role in the school and school district, I am often asked to be on hiring committees for teaching, administration, and school counseling positions. Being a member of these committees takes a huge amount of time. Thanks to School Spring and similar job search engines, schools are inundated with applications from people all over the country. And yes, we do have to read almost all of them. Do yourself a favor and make sure that your readers are happy and interested! Then, when you get an interview, make the interviewers understand how you can: (1) quickly integrate into the school community; (2) assess and address the needs of kids, staff, and the school community (and then evaluate how well your plan is working); and (3) ensure that the school counseling program is strong and functional. Here are some additional tips: 1. Do a test of SchoolSpring or whatever job search engine you are using. Make sure that all your materials come through in their entirety. Of course, you will already have checked that all sections are completed, well... read more
by schoolcounselingbyheart | Feb 20, 2012 | group counseling, planning, social thinking
I am just as happy as the next person to be completely prepared well in advance of all groups, classes, individual sessions, presentations, meetings, etc., with copies made, technology tested, and materials arranged. However, the reality of school counseling means that sometimes planning and prep have to happen on the fly. Perhaps an issue has arisen in a particular classroom or grade, and you have to go in to address it on a minute’s notice. Or you find out that an assembly was scheduled without you knowing it and you have to move a class or group to an earlier time. Or a kid is on her way after being asked to leave class because of some behavior that is getting in the way of others’ learning. Yikes! This calls for Guerilla Planning! Guerilla???? guerrilla, guerilla [gəˈrɪlə] n 1. (Military) a. a member of an irregular usually politically motivated armed force that combats stronger regular forces, such as the army or police b. (as modifier) guerrilla warfare 2. (Life Sciences & Allied Applications / Botany) a form of vegetative spread in which the advance is from several individual rhizomes or stolons growing rapidly away from the centre, as in some clovers. Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged Well, probably some people think of me as irregular, but I am generally unarmed, unless you count sharpies, and not all that politically motivated, at least while at school. I do, however, combat stronger regular forces — like too much to do in too little time, schedules I cannot control, and teachers’ room bathrooms that are always full when I have... read more
